Remaja & Konflik

Cabaran Remaja

Perubahan-perubahan fizikal, emosi dan social semasa remaja memberi kesan terhadap kesihatan mental.

• Masalah-Masalah Yang Sering Dihadapi Remaja
• Keliru dengan peranan dan tanggungjawab diri
• Sering merasa diri disalahfahamkan dan dipersalahkan
• Merasa diri dilayan secara tidak adil
• Kesunyian
• Sukar memahami emosi
• Susah membuat keputusan

Hubungan Dengan IbuBapa

Remaja yang mempunyai hubungan baik dengan ibubapa mereka sering menjalin perhubungan yang mesra dengan orang lain. Mereka juga kurang mengalami masalah kesihatan mental.

Cara-Cara Menjalin Perhubungan Yang Lebih Rapat Dengan IbuBapa

1. Menghormati dan sedia meneriam tunjuk-ajar dan teguran mereka
2. Membincangkan masalah anda dengan mereka
3. Meluahkan perasaan dan pendapat anda secata terus terang
4. Tunjukkan kasih sayang anda melalui kata-kata ataupun perbuatan
5. Cuba memahami masalah dan beban ibubapa anda
6. Meraikan harijadi mereka
7. Ingatlah bahawa ibubapa menyayangi anda dan mahukan yang terbaik untuk anda

MENANGANI EMOSI

• Keupayaan memahami emosi adalah penting di dalam kehidupan harian
• Apabila Anda Merasa Marah
• Tarik nafas sedalam-dalamnya. Beredar dari suasana tegang (jika perlu)
• Berfikir sebelum bertindak
• Tanya diri sendiri
• Kenapa saya marah ?
• Apalah punca masalah ?
• Apakah yang telah saya lakukan ?

PENYELESAIAN KONFLIK

1. Kenalpasti punca konflik
2. Dengan dulu apa yang hendak disampaikan oleh orang lain
3. Nyatakan apa yang anda kehendaki dan mengapa anda marah
4. Janganlah menyalahkan orang lain
5. Tumpukan perhatian kepada tindakan yang menyebabkan konflik
6. Bertenang semasa menerangkan pendapat anda
7. Bincangkan bersama cara-cara penyelesaian masalah
8. Carilah penyelesaian yang menguntungkan kedua belah pihak
9. Remaja yang Positif
10. Bertimbang rasa
11. Yakin terhadap diri sendiri
12. Sedia menerima nasihat dan teguran
13. Sabar
14. Bertanggungjawab
15. Rajin dan suka menolong
16. Mahir berkomunikasi

Sayings for Teenagers (Heart Hardening).

Prophet of Islam, Muhammad (peace be upon him) has said: "Do not speak excessively without the remembrance of Allah (SWT), since verily excessive speaking without the remembrance of Allah (SWT) makes the heart hard."

Allah revealed to Prophet Musa / Moses (peace be upon him): "(O Musa!) Do not have long desires or hopes for the world since this will make your heart hard and the one whose heart is hard far away from Me!"

Imam Ali (peace be upon him) said: "The eyes do not dry (tears are not stopped) except due to the heart becoming hard. And the heart does not become hard except due to increase in sins."

Imam Ali (peace be upon him) said: "Looking at a stingy person makes the heart hard."

Imam Ali (peace be upon him) said: "An abundance of wealth corrupts the religion and hardens the heart."

Most Beautiful Heart

One day a young man was standing in the middle of the town proclaiming that he had the most beautiful heart in the whole valley.

A large crowd gathered and they all admired his heart for it was perfect.

There was not a mark or a flaw in it.

Yes, they all agreed it truly was the most beautiful heart they had ever seen.

The young man was very proud and boasted more loudly about his beautiful heart.

Suddenly, an old man appeared at the front of the crowd and said, "Why your heart is not nearly as beautiful as mine."

The crowd and the young man looked at the old man's heart. It was beating strongly ... but full of scars. It had places where pieces had been removed and other pieces put in ... but they didn't fit quite right and there were several jagged edges.

In fact, in some places there were deep gouges where whole pieces were missing.

The people starred ... how could he say his heart is more beautiful, they thought?

The young man looked at the old man's heart and saw its state and laughed. "You must be joking," he said. "Compare your heart with mine ... mine is perfect and yours is a mess of scars and tears."

"Yes," said the old man, "Yours is perfect looking ... but I would never trade with you. You see, every scar represents a person to whom I have given my love ..... I tear out a piece of my heart and give it to them ... and often they give me a piece of their heart which fits into the empty place in my heart ... but because the pieces aren't exact, I have some rough edges, which I cherish, because they remind me of the love we shared.

Sometimes I have given pieces of my heart away ... and the other person hasn't returned a piece of his heart to me. These are the empty gouges ... giving love is taking a chance. Although these gouges are painful, they stay open, reminding me of the love I have for these people too ... and I hope someday they may return and fill the space I have waiting. So now do you see what true beauty is?"

The young man stood silently with tears running down his cheeks. He walked up to the old man, reached into his perfect young and beautiful heart, and ripped a piece out. He offered it to the old man with trembling hands.

The old man took his offering, placed it in his heart and then took a piece from his old scarred heart and placed it in the wound in the young man's heart.

It fit .... but not perfectly, as there were some jagged edges.

The young man looked at his heart, not perfect anymore but more beautiful than ever, since love from the old man's heart flowed into his.

They embraced and walked away side by side.

Wealth, Love and Success

You learn to love, not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly.

A woman came out of her house and saw three old men with long white beards sitting in her front yard. She did not recognize them. She said "I don't think I know you, but you must be hungry. Please come in and have something to eat."

"Is the man of the house home?", they asked.

"No", she replied. "He's out."

"Then we cannot come in", they replied.

In the evening when her husband came home, she told him what had happened.

"Go tell them I am home and invite them in!"

The woman went out and invited the men in.

"We do not go into a House together," they replied.

"Why is that?" she asked.

One of the old men explained: "His name is Wealth," he said pointing to one of his friends, and said pointing to another one, "He is Success, and I am Love." Then he added, "Now go in and discuss with your husband which one of us you want in your home?"

The woman went in and told her husband what was said. Her husband was overjoyed. "How nice!", he said. "Since that is the case, let us invite Wealth. Let him come and fill our home with wealth!"

His wife disagreed. "My dear, why don't we invite Success?"

Their daughter-in-law was listening from the other corner of the house. She jumped in with her own suggestion: "Would it not be better to invite Love? Our home will then be filled with love!"

"Let us heed our daughter-in-law's advice," said the husband to his wife.

"Go out and invite Love to be our guest."

The woman went out and asked the three old men, Which one of you is Love? Please come in and be our guest.

Love got up and started walking toward the house. The other two old men also got up and followed him. Surprised, the lady asked Wealth and Success: I only invited Love, Why are you coming in?

The old men replied together: If you had invited Wealth or Success, the other two of us would've stayed out, but since you invited Love, wherever He goes, we go with him. Wherever there is Love, there is also Wealth and Success!!!

cara mengatasi marah

1. Mengubah Poisisi

Rasullulah SAW bersabda: Apabila salah seorang di antara kamu marah, dan ketika itu dia di dalam keadaan berdiri, maka hendaklah dia duduk. Kerana hal itu akan menghilangkan marahnya. Dan kalau tidak, maka hendaklah dia berbarinng.(Riwayat Muslim)

2. Berwuduk

Rasullullah SAW bersabda: Marah itu datangnya daripada syaitan, dan syaitan itu diciptakan daripada api, sedangkan api itu hanya dipadamkan dengan air. Oleh itu, apabila salah seorang di antara kamu marah, maka hendaklah ia berwuduk. (RIwayat Abi Daud)

3. Berlindung Kepada Allah Daripada Syaitan

Digalakkan supaya kita membaca doa bagi menghilangkan rasa marah iaitu :

اعوذ بالله من الشيطان الرجيم،اللهم اغفرلي ذنبي واذهب غيظ قلبي وأجرني من الشيطان الرجيم

(A’uudzubillahi minasy syaithoonirrojiim, allahummaghfirli dzanbi wadzhab ghoidho qolbii, wa ajirnii minasy syaithoonirrojiim)

Maksudnya :
Aku berlindung kepada Allah dari syaitan yang terkutuk, Yaa Allah ampunilah dosaku dan hilangkanlah kepanasan hatiku dan lepaskanlah aku dari syaitan yang terkutuk.

4. Berfikiran Positif
Anggaplah sesuatu perkara yang terjadi itu adalah ujian bagi kita dan semoga kita dapat melepasi ujian tersebut. Apa yang kita fikirkan memang benar-benar mempengaruhi fikiran kita. Apabila perkara yang difikirkkan kita adalah baik, maka kita cenderung melakukan perkara yang baik juga dan begitulah sebaliknya. Ini sebabnya mengapa Allah SWT dengan murah hati memberikan kita pahala apabila kita berniat untuk melakukan kebaikkan.

5. Maafkan Orang Lain
Maafkan selalu kekurangan orang lain yang mungkin membuat anda marah. Yakinkan diri bahawa setiap manusia pasti memiliki kekurangan masing-masing. Ini kerana tiada insan di duania yang sempurna kerana kesempurnaan itu hanya terletak pada Allah SWT.

6. Meluahkan Perasaan
Kita boleh meluahkan perasaan dengan menceritakan sesuatu yang terjadi pada diri kita kepada seseorang yang kita percayai. Kemungkinan dengan ini, sedikit sebanyak membantu mengurangi beban yang ada di hati. Namum kita harus cari masa dan tempat yang bersesuaian untuk meluahkan perasaan..


oleh itu, terimalah bahawa segala kekurangan yang diberikan oleh Allah pasti mempunyai hikmahnya yang tersendiri. Banyak perkara buruk yang berlaku dalam kehidupan kita sebenarnya membawa seribu erti untuk kita terokai dan kita hayati. Jesteru, sama0-samalah kita beristifar dan berdoa agar sentiasa dijauhi daripada sifat amarah.

Adakah kebahagiaan itu milikku

Jangan cari perbezaan dari segi luaran tapi carilah persamaan secara dalaman, kerana secara dalaman sebenarnya kita mempunyai banyak persamaan.

Kadang………

Kita merasa rindu bilakah kebahagiaan akan datang

Kadang……….

Saat kebahagiaan datang bingung pun menjelang

Kadang…….

Bingung pun pergi berganti rasa takut di hati

Mengapa kebahagiaan cepat berlalu pergi

Bergantinya sebuah perasaan

Menggariskan betapa manusia serba kekurangan

Hingga tak mampu mengecap erti kebahagiaan

Dan kadang…….

Aku pun merasa benci pada diri ini

Di saat duka aku rasa bahagia

Saat bahagia terasa penuh air mata

Entah apa sebenarnya erti bahagia

Mungkin cukup hati yang mampu merasainya

Kepuasan atas Rahmat dan kurniaan-Nya

Boleh membuat tenteram di Jiwa

Mungkinkah itu erti Bahagia yang sesungguhnya????

Malam Yang Memberi Ketenangan

Malam,

Ketika semua suara mulai lelap dalam kesunyian

Hanya terdengar suara hati bergemuruh dalam dada

Aku seperti melihat laut yang tak tersentuh oleh angin, tenang!

Tenang di permukaan, gemuruh suara ikan didalamnya

Aku membayangkan melihat laut yang tenang di malam hari

Dipadukan dengan remang cahaya bulan

Tenang dan indah!

Kini aku sadar

Kenapa malam diciptakan

Kenapa dunia ini tak di isi hanya dengan pagi

Hanya dengan siang saja!

Malam adalah pengaduan, Mengadulah!

Dan jawablah sendiri!

Kerana kau sudah punya jawapannya

Nikmatilah malammu

Jangan hanya kau gunakan untuk tidur

Bangkit dan renungkanlah

Apa yang sudah kau lakukan hari ini?

…..

…….

Sudah?

………

Kau sudah dapat jawabannya?

Terimalah….

Dan gunakan itu untuk esok hari.